Conduct & Harassment Policy

The Humanists of Hemet and San Jacinto (HHSJ) is committed to maintaining a welcoming, respectful, and harassment-free community for everyone who participates in our activities.

Humanism calls us to recognize the dignity and worth of other human beings, even when we disagree with them. A healthy humanist community should encourage open inquiry, spirited discussion, intellectual disagreement, humor, friendship, and social connection while also respecting personal boundaries and protecting people from harassment, intimidation, discrimination, and abuse.

HHSJ welcomes people regardless of race, ethnicity, national origin, sex, gender, gender identity or expression, sexual orientation, age, physical appearance, body size, disability, socioeconomic status, religious background, nonreligious worldview, or other personal characteristics.

Harassment or abusive behavior toward participants will not be tolerated.

This policy applies to HHSJ members, guests, organizers, officers, board members, volunteers, speakers, presenters, vendors, and other participants.

It applies not only during formal HHSJ meetings and events, but also to HHSJ-sponsored social activities, volunteer projects, informal gatherings associated with an HHSJ event, and online spaces operated or moderated by HHSJ.

Participation in HHSJ activities constitutes an agreement to conduct oneself in accordance with these standards.

Our Standard of Conduct

We expect members and guests to treat one another as human beings worthy of dignity and respect.

That does not mean everyone must agree.

HHSJ is a humanist organization that values free thought, skepticism, critical inquiry, and open discussion. Members may hold sharply different opinions about religion, philosophy, politics, culture, science, ethics, and social issues. Respectful disagreement is an important part of an intellectually healthy community.

We ask participants to criticize ideas without dehumanizing people.

Disagreement, criticism, questioning, debate, and expressing an unpopular opinion do not by themselves constitute harassment. Conduct becomes inappropriate when disagreement turns into threats, intimidation, personal abuse, targeted harassment, discrimination, persistent unwanted behavior, or deliberate interference with another person’s ability to participate in the community.

Our goal is not to create an environment in which no one is ever challenged or offended. Our goal is to maintain an environment where people can discuss difficult subjects while respecting the dignity, safety, and reasonable personal boundaries of others.

Misconduct and Harassment

Misconduct includes behavior that a reasonable person would understand as threatening, intimidating, harassing, abusive, seriously disruptive, or persistently disrespectful.

Examples may include:

  • Threats, intimidation, or coercion;
  • Stalking or deliberately following another person after being asked to stop;
  • Physical assault, fighting, or threatening physical behavior;
  • Unwanted or inappropriate physical contact;
  • Unwelcome sexual attention, sexual advances, or sexually suggestive conduct directed toward another participant;
  • Repeatedly ignoring a person’s clearly expressed personal boundaries;
  • Harassing photography, video recording, or audio recording;
  • Deliberately disrupting presentations, meetings, discussions, or other HHSJ activities after being asked to stop;
  • Persistent personal verbal attacks, insults, or abusive behavior directed at another participant;
  • Targeted derogatory or degrading comments based upon a person’s race, ethnicity, sex, gender, gender identity or expression, sexual orientation, disability, age, religious identity, nonreligious identity, or similar personal characteristics;
  • Encouraging or threatening violence against an individual or group;
  • Publishing or threatening to publish another participant’s private personal information without permission;
  • Repeated unwanted communications or contact;
  • Retaliating against someone for reporting a concern or participating in a review of a complaint;
  • Aggressive solicitation or commercial activity that violates HHSJ policy; or
  • Other behavior that reasonably threatens the safety or ability of another person to participate in HHSJ activities.

Not every uncomfortable interaction constitutes harassment. Human relationships sometimes involve misunderstandings, disagreements, awkwardness, and occasional mistakes. Whenever practical, participants are encouraged to communicate respectfully and resolve minor conflicts directly.

However, no participant is required to personally confront someone whose behavior makes them feel unsafe or threatened.

Patterns of inappropriate conduct may also be considered when evaluating a complaint. Repeated behavior can become harassment even when individual incidents, considered separately, might appear relatively minor.

Personal Boundaries and Consent

HHSJ expects participants to respect personal boundaries.

Consent should be affirmative and freely given.

Yes means yes. No means no. Uncertainty is not consent.

If someone declines an invitation, physical contact, conversation, romantic attention, or another personal interaction, their decision should be respected without pressure or repeated requests.

Participants should not assume that another person is comfortable with physical contact simply because the contact seems friendly or harmless.

This includes hugging, touching someone’s shoulders, placing a hand on someone’s back or knee, or similar physical contact.

When in doubt, ask.

A simple question such as, “May I give you a hug?” allows another person to decide what level of physical contact they are comfortable with.

Respecting someone’s boundaries is an expression of consideration, not distance.

Sexuality and Adult Conversation

Humanists should be able to discuss human sexuality, relationships, reproductive issues, gender, and other adult subjects when those topics are relevant to a discussion or presentation.

At the same time, HHSJ events are community spaces rather than sexually charged environments.

Sexually explicit comments, sexualized joking directed at individuals, unwanted romantic or sexual attention, or conduct that makes another participant reasonably feel targeted or pressured is inappropriate.

Speakers and presenters should exercise reasonable judgment when discussing sexual subjects and should avoid gratuitously sexual material when it is unrelated to the subject being presented.

Disagreement Is Not Harassment

Humanism depends upon the freedom to question ideas.

Participants may criticize religions, religious doctrines, political positions, philosophical systems, cultural practices, pseudoscientific claims, social movements, public policies, and other ideas.

Likewise, other participants may criticize humanism, atheism, secularism, or positions commonly held by members of HHSJ.

The fact that a discussion concerns an important part of someone’s personal identity does not automatically make disagreement harassment.

Participants should nevertheless distinguish between criticizing beliefs, ideas, institutions, or conduct and attacking people because of who they are.

For example, discussing or criticizing the doctrines of Christianity, Islam, Judaism, Hinduism, atheism, or any other worldview is permissible. Targeting an individual participant with hostility simply because that person belongs to a religious or nonreligious group is not.

Similarly, questions concerning public policy may be debated vigorously. The basic dignity and equal standing of people participating in our community, however, should not become an excuse for humiliation, intimidation, or targeted abuse.

We encourage participants to approach disagreement with intellectual honesty, curiosity, and generosity.

Challenge ideas.

Ask difficult questions.

Defend your conclusions.

But remember that the person sitting across from you remains a fellow human being.

Reporting a Concern

If you experience harassment or misconduct, witness inappropriate behavior, or have another concern about conduct at an HHSJ activity, we encourage you to contact an HHSJ organizer, board member, or designated event representative.

You may report a concern involving your own experience or something you witnessed involving another person.

When possible, HHSJ will identify organizers or event contacts so participants know whom they can approach for assistance.

If a situation involves an immediate threat to someone’s physical safety, participants should contact appropriate emergency services when necessary rather than relying solely upon HHSJ organizers.

HHSJ will make reasonable efforts to respond promptly and respectfully to reports.

Our first concern will be the immediate safety and well-being of the people involved.

Depending upon the circumstances, organizers may help someone move to another part of the event, arrange for another person to accompany them, ask an individual to leave, contact venue security, or take other reasonable measures.

How Reports Are Handled

Reports of misconduct should be evaluated fairly and in context.

When appropriate, HHSJ leadership may speak separately with the person making the report, the person whose conduct has been questioned, and witnesses who may have relevant information.

The purpose of this process is not to conduct a courtroom proceeding. It is to determine what actions, if any, are reasonably necessary to protect the community and uphold HHSJ standards.

Relevant considerations may include:

  • The nature and seriousness of the conduct;
  • Whether the behavior was intentional;
  • Whether someone had previously been asked to stop;
  • Whether the behavior involved a threat to physical safety;
  • Whether similar concerns have previously been reported;
  • Whether the conduct appears to be part of a continuing pattern;
  • The impact upon the people involved and the wider community; and
  • Whether reasonable corrective measures are available.

HHSJ will seek to respond proportionately to the circumstances.

Possible Responses to Misconduct

Depending upon the seriousness and circumstances of the conduct, HHSJ organizers or leadership may take actions including:

  • Having an informal conversation with a participant about their behavior;
  • Asking someone to stop particular conduct;
  • Giving a verbal or written warning;
  • Establishing behavioral expectations for future participation;
  • Asking individuals to avoid direct interaction with one another;
  • Removing someone from a particular meeting or event;
  • Restricting participation in certain HHSJ activities;
  • Suspending participation for a period of time;
  • Removing a person from online HHSJ spaces;
  • Revoking membership when permitted by HHSJ governing documents;
  • Prohibiting someone from attending future HHSJ activities; or
  • Contacting venue security or appropriate authorities when circumstances warrant.

Serious misconduct may result in immediate removal without a prior warning.

When an individual is removed from an event because of misconduct, HHSJ is not obligated to refund donations, admission charges, registration fees, or other payments associated with that event.

Confidentiality and Privacy

HHSJ recognizes that reports concerning harassment or interpersonal conflicts may involve sensitive information.

We will make reasonable efforts to respect the privacy of those involved and to limit discussion of a complaint to people who have a legitimate need to know.

Complete confidentiality cannot always be guaranteed. Information may need to be shared in order to investigate a concern, protect another participant, comply with legal obligations, or allow HHSJ leadership to make an informed decision.

Participants involved in reviewing complaints should nevertheless exercise discretion and avoid unnecessary gossip or public discussion of private matters.

No Retaliation

Retaliation against someone for making a good-faith report of misconduct, supporting another participant who makes a report, or providing information during a review is itself a violation of this policy.

A report made in good faith does not become misconduct simply because HHSJ ultimately determines that disciplinary action is unnecessary.

At the same time, knowingly making false allegations for the purpose of harming another person may itself constitute misconduct.

Community Responsibility

Maintaining a healthy community is not solely the responsibility of HHSJ officers or organizers.

All of us help create the culture of the organization.

Members can contribute by welcoming newcomers, respecting boundaries, listening when someone says they are uncomfortable, discouraging abusive behavior, helping calm unnecessarily hostile situations, and treating disagreements as opportunities for conversation rather than personal combat.

Bystanders who witness serious misconduct are encouraged to notify an organizer when doing so can be accomplished safely.

Humanist ethics are expressed not only through what we believe, but through how we treat the people around us.

Sales, Solicitation, and Commercial Activity

HHSJ exists primarily for community, education, service, discussion, and humanist activities. Our meetings and events should not become marketplaces for unsolicited commercial activity.

Participants may not use HHSJ events to sell products or services, conduct fundraising unrelated to HHSJ, distribute substantial promotional material, or aggressively solicit members without prior permission from HHSJ leadership.

Some venues may prohibit sales or solicitation entirely, in which case those venue rules must be followed.

Occasional announcements about a participant’s book, artwork, business, community project, or similar activity may be appropriate when approved by an organizer and presented in a way that does not interfere with the event.

Repeated or aggressive solicitation that makes participants uncomfortable or interferes with HHSJ activities may be treated as misconduct.

When in doubt, please ask an HHSJ organizer before selling, advertising, fundraising, or soliciting at an event.

A Community Built on Humanist Values

A conduct policy cannot anticipate every possible human interaction.

Rules are useful, but the larger principle is simpler.

Treat people with dignity.

Respect their boundaries.

Disagree without dehumanizing.

Listen as well as speak.

Accept correction when you make a mistake.

Protect the freedom of others to participate.

And remember that a humanist community should be judged not merely by the principles it professes, but by the way its members treat one another.

HHSJ wants to be a place where people can think freely, discuss openly, form friendships, laugh, learn, disagree, volunteer, celebrate, and work together toward a more compassionate and rational world.

We ask everyone who participates in our community to help us make that possible.